Freedom From Toxic Beliefs
College gals have much to be concerned about. Some were concerned about grades, others about which party they would attend. Still others were concerned about maintaining integrity in a party hearty environment. But I was also concerned about not wearing pants, dying my hair, or using make-up. That brings me to an article from AOL News about the “fashion sense” of polygamist wives. I’ve always wondered why they wore prairie dresses, the same hairstyle, and no make-up. They apparently dress so plainly to avoid competition. If all of the women look alike, there would be no reason for a man to favor one wife over the other. In turn, there would be no jealousy. I personally do not believe that rivalry would cease to exist due to how the women look, but it is the claim of the sect nonetheless. But you know something, their reasons for intentionally looking unattractive were quite different from what I experienced attending a strict pentecostal church.
When I first became a born-again christian, I was a part of a church which taught that pants were off limits for women. Deuteronomy 22:5 was the scripture in question:
5 A woman must not wear men’s clothing, nor a man wear women’s clothing, for the LORD your God detests anyone who does this. (NIV–BibleGateway.com)
So there you have it. Because of someone’s interpretation of this passage, I once believed that I would go to hell if I wore pants. But it didn’t stop there. My former church also taught that women should not wear make-up or dye their hair. Christians from other denominations and “new Pentecostals” would try to get me to relax about certain issues. It wasn’t until much later that I saw the light.
So what was the straw that broke the camels back? Well, there was one young lady in the church who decided to wear her hair natural (“unstraightened”), another set of young ladies decided to wear braids. Alas, the pastor (who is black btw) declared that in order to be a Godly woman, you must straighten your hair and stay away from braids. In other words, you must appear more white. It was then that I found out that people were not allowed to wear afros in my denomination during the 70′s. After hearing such things, I said, “enough of this crap.” Eventually, I left that church and moved onto one a bit more sensible.
My wardrobe today consists mostly of pants. Many people tell me that my jeans can be a bit too form-fitting so I try not to go to extremes. I also wear my nails long with bold polish at times. As for make-up, I use it occasionally depending on where I’m going. Now for the all important hair. My hair in it’s natural state is similar to Scary Spice. If the mood strikes, I wear it as such but most of the time, it is blowed straight. As trivial as it may seem to some, I am no longer concerned with wearing braids and will likely get it done again soon. Since humidity is upon us here in NY, my hair gets a bit frizzy. In other words, the relaxer won’t hold up.
Will I go out with a plunging neckline or see through clothing? Absolutely not! But, I am no longer worried about my eternal soul because of what I’m wearing.
